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horoscope for people who never pick up their phone

10/7/2019

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lucky number: 39
 
lucky charm: batteries and rubber bands, particularly when kept in one’s pocket
 
auspicious entity: postcards with horses on them, pendrives containing heavy metal music, a box full of fresh strawberries.
 
predictions and advice:


  • the yellow raincoat looks best on you. remember if you hear news about a storm, do not panic. some clouds can sense it, and might stop over for a cup of tea.
  • clicking your fingers three times while whistling will send out a signal into a very specific spiritual realm for deceased birds. do not try at home, unless you are very polite.
  • be nice to your best friends’ grandparents. unless you know they’re abusive, in which case, be extra nice to your best friend.
  • having a box of cassettes in the attic is a personality trait, regardless of what your partner says. it is also a personality trait that you must not be ashamed to cultivate when the time calls for it.
  • you have the potential for great amounts of bravery, if you can believe it. please believe it. 
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    Divya Iyer

    Divya Iyer is a queer, nonbinary poet and writer from India. They are fond of frogs, playgrounds, libraries and blanket cocoons, and have no idea what gender is, so don't ask. They know nothing about astrology, but when they were 10 one of their friends said that they had the power to predict the future, and as you can see, ten years later, they're still not over it. You can find them at @ divwhine on Twitter. 

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  • Home
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