horoscope for girls who laugh too loud

lucky number: 15.72
 
lucky charm: newspaper cuttings, paper clips, broken fridge magnets
 
auspicious entity: milk teeth (preferably your own, if not, to be given with consent and not stolen), chewing gum wrappers (especially pink and green ones) and bottle cap openers.
 
predictions and advice:

• if you want a certain type of jacket, buy it. some options include denim jackets, leather jackets, patchwork jackets and jackets a shade of green that make them look as if they’ve been woven out of moss. if your mother asks if you’re in a gang, say yes.
• learn a new song. learn it intimately, until every second of it feels like being in a familiar place. one day you can make a home out of it.
• one of your internet friends might just be a werewolf. do not be afraid.
• carry a box of matches in your pocket. just in case. the likelihood of you needing to use it is very small. its main purpose is protection.
• don’t ever quiet down for anyone. if somebody says you are too unwieldy to love, tell them that it’s not your fault that they have a low love capacity. if someone says they love you, trust your gut.