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horoscope for adults who drink cocoa

1/29/2020

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lucky number: any whole number between 10 and 99 that ends in 4.
 
lucky charm: false teeth. dentures work, but so do vampire fangs leftover from halloween.
 
auspicious entity: mackintosh boots, a mixtape made by a friend, a napkin stolen from a restaurant that you visit often.
 
predictions and advice:
 
  • apparel that is dark green, worn on thursday, will attract the energy you want in your life.
  • don’t trust things that give you a reason not to trust them. this includes the elf in your garage, by the way.
  • sometimes a tenner is just a tenner. other times it is a gateway to another world. be brave.
  • there’s a step that you always skip when coming down the stairs. keep skipping it.
  • don’t let anyone tell you you’re too old to do the things you enjoy doing. unless, of course, you’re gambling with the elf in the garage, in which case – you’re too young for this. come back in around 300 years. 
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    Divya Iyer

    Divya Iyer is a queer, nonbinary poet and writer from India. They are fond of frogs, playgrounds, libraries and blanket cocoons, and have no idea what gender is, so don't ask. They know nothing about astrology, but when they were 10 one of their friends said that they had the power to predict the future, and as you can see, ten years later, they're still not over it. You can find them at @ divwhine on Twitter. 

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  • Home
  • ABOUT
    • HISTORY
  • CONTENT
    • POETRY
    • PROSE
    • ARCHIVES
    • MUSIC
    • COLUMNS >
      • TIMEFIGHTERS & UNBELIEVERS
      • unearthly horoscopes from your dreamy, vaguely occult ghost
      • Heartworms
      • Just Sucking
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